Yokukhululeka codependency endleleni eya enkululekweni

Uma kuziwa ukulutheka, iningi lethu kukhona izithombe zabantu abaphethwe okubizwa ngokuthi chemical ukuncika (ukuluthwa utshwala, izidakamizwa, ukubhema). Ngaphezu ukwencika sibiza overreliance kukhompyutha (imidlalo, ukuxhumana nomphakathi) nokugembula.

Nokho, kukhona ama-co-kwencika ukuthi ihlukile kwezinye izinhlobo kwencika lehlanganisa bantfu okungenani ezimbili kule nqubo. Futhi inkululeko kusuka codependency kungaholela ikhambi nezinye izinkinga eziningi, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi imfuyo ukusetshenziswa, noma "ukuphila" ngendlela yokuxhumana.

Udinga ukwazi ukuthi impi

Ukuqeda codependency, kumelwe siqonde kuqala ukuthi yini ukuthi liyini nokuthi kuyingozi. Kukhona ngempela uhlu olude izici wobuntu codependency, sibale ezinye zazo:

• umuntu codependent kuyelapha lapho abanye lokungavuleli;
• ibhekene umuzwa wecala ngoba inkinga yomunye umuntu;
• wesabe inyumbazane;
• Uyahlukana izwe ku "black" futhi "simhlophe";
• ngokungafanele idealize abanye futhi kuyabacasula ngalokho azizivuni ayekulindele;
• Akakwazi ukuhlukanisa phakathi imicabango nemizwa yakhe kusukela emicabangweni nasendleleni ababezizwa ngayo abanye abantu.

Uhlu kuqhubeka, kodwa kuzo zonke lezi zici ukubonakalisa ubuntu Isula imingcele engqondweni equlekile.

Angalulama noma cha?

I bendabuko indlela yezokwelapha uphendula lo mbuzo okungekuhle, omema ukungakwazi ezibhekene izici zokwakheka kanye lezinceku ezihilelekile ekwakhekeni ukuziphatha nasekuthengeni.

Nokho, njengoba uBarry Dzheney Uaynhold abathi yokukhululeka codependency - siwukukhululwa wokuqala nomkhulu kunabo bonke kusukela sidle, izinkinga ezingaxazululwanga ekuqaleni kuka ebuntwaneni iklayenti. Umuntu ngamunye labetibambile eziningi izigaba ezibalulekile inqubo yabo nentuthuko. Zonke izinyathelo ezihlobene ne ukwedlulela indoda komunye esigabeni kwesinye, kumele sigcwaliswe ngendlela eyamukelekile, kungenjalo kukhona ingozi ukuziphatha ezihlanekezelwe.

Mhlawumbe, ngesikhathi esithile isikhathi emlandweni iklayenti adicilelwe imingcele futhi kwaba isenzakalo, inkumbulo futhi ekutadisheni okuzokwenza usinde wenkululeko. Kusukela codependency ngokuvamile ukusihlukanisa izinyathelo eziningana, futhi kubalulekile ukuba siqaphele ikakhulukazi uma ngokukhulisa izingane.

Into esemqoka - kuba inkululeko

Encwadini yakhe ethi, "Ukukhululwa kusukela codependency" Berry Uaynhold Lugxile nomqondo inkululeko njengoba isici izinga yomuntu. Freedom kusikisela isimo esithile, okungenza awutholakali ngokugxila kuphela ezintweni ezenzeka ngaphandle. Nokho, le nkululeko akusho kodwa bangalimali kanye nomqondo ovulekile. Okokuqala kubalulekile ukuqonda, kulokho sifuna ukukhululeka.

Yokukhululeka codependency kuhilela isikhalazo wokuqala iso kwangaphakathi ukubona ayo "Mina", e nokuqaphela izimbangela ukuthi ekuziphatheni kwethu.

Indlela eholela ekululameni

Ezimweni eziningi, kukhululwa kwebantfu sozavisimosti isicupho ngezindlela ezimbili:

1. Nge gxila co-kwencika njengoba ukugula, njengoba izinto zangaphandle, ngawo ukulwa.

2. Ukusetshenziswa ukwakha ubuhlobo obusha bakho nabantu obathandayo.

Kodwa kukhona indlela yesithathu, which busisa incwadi "Liberation kusukela codependency." Le ndlela isekelwe yokuthi co-kwencika akuyona isifo esingalapheki, futhi ngempela ngempumelelo ukulungiswa.

Neqiniso lokuthi muntu ku sisendleleni eya enkululekweni

Codependent Ubudlelwano basibhubhise umuntu, njengoba kuyosishintsha Ukufiphalisa of imingcele ungubani, ukuze ukulahlekelwa esinqunyiwe yokuzibona futhi chaza kwenye. Sebenza lokuthuthukisa ikhono siqu, ukuziqaphela yabo iyonke kuholela nasekuqiniseni kwemingcele yayo "Mina".

Ukuze balahle codependency ubuhlungu, namuhla ephumelela kunazo 12-step hlelo, ehlanganisa kwenaba kancane kancane inkinga kobuhlobo ayesekelana. Phakathi umsebenzi lolu hlelo, umuntu efunda baqikelele ezimpilweni zabo futhi ngenxa yalokho, abe umuntu ovuthiwe.

Codependency futhi umphakathi

Nokho, ukukhulula ekubeni umlutha nzima yokuthi umphakathi wanamuhla akanandaba ukuthuthukiswa ngabanye. Ukubumbana nethimba umoya - kuhle lokho. Kodwa, ngakolunye uhlangothi, umphakathi osekelwe phezu co-kwencika - umphumela umhlambi, ifiphele "I" yakhe, ukungabikho umbono, ngenxa yalokho, ithonya ukuchayeka yomunye umbono.

Nokho, abantu - isidalwa kwezenhlalo futhi awukwazi zingaxhumani. Ngo umzabalazo wenkululeko kusukela codependency abanye abantu anganikeza usizo olungenakuqhathaniswa nosizo. Ikakhulukazi, ukukhululeka codependency imibhangqwana ishesha kakhulu, iyashelela futhi kancane ubuhlungu uma kwenziwe ngokushesha ukuze bobabili abashadile. Ukuvakashela amaqembu ahlukahlukene ukwesekwa futhi ukusiza ukusheshisa le nqubo zokuphulukisa ngenxa ithonya elihle kwabanye abantu nezinkinga ezifanayo. Futhi ekugcineni, ukufunda izincwadi ugqozi ku ukukhululwa yimpumelelo sizonikeza izidingo ushintsho siqu.

Prevention codependency

Into elula esingakwenza ukuvikela ingane yakho kusukela ubuhlobo codependent esikhathini esizayo, kuba ingane isencane abe sinobuhlobo obuqinile naye, kodwa ngesikhathi esifanayo ahloniphe imingcele yakhe. Ukuze wenze lokhu, kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuthi ingane - kungcono umuntu ovumelekile ukuba imizwa yabo nemizwa yabo. Lapho sinokuthile enqabela ndoda omncane kakhulu ukudlula kuvunyelwe, angase ayisekho zethembe futhi bathembele umuntu, 'sifaneleke' umbono.