Abesifazane bakhetha ucansi lokuhlalisana ngokukhuluma ngenhliziyo

Ngamunye wethu unezindlela zakhe zokuxazulula izinkinga ebuhlotsheni. Abanye asikwazi ngisho ukulawula: othile uqala ukukhala, othile uyamemeza. Kukhona labo abakhetha ukunganaki izinkinga futhi bahumushe noma yikuphi ukuphikisana ngethenda futhi abanesithakazelo "masikhohlwe ngakho konke" ngokocansi. Sisebenzisa ucansi futhi sicabanga ukuthi sikwazi "ukulungisa" ubuhlobo. Kodwa akusiyo ukuthi isebenza kakhulu, okuqinisekiswa ukutadisha kwamuva. Kwabuye kwaqaphela ukuthi abesifazane abazizwa besondelene sebeye baqonda isikhathi eside lokhu.

Kusukela ekubukeni komphakathi

Ucwaningo olusha oluthiwa "Ukungafani Kokuziphatha Ngemva Kokuxabana KwamaRoma" (kubonakala sengathi kuyashisa!) Kuphakamisa ukuthi nakuba abantu bathanda ukuthola izinsizakalo zocansi (njengokunethezeka komlomo) noma "ukuziphatha okuhle" ngemva kokuxabana, abesifazane abatholi izinqumo zobulili eziwusizo.

Kusukela ekukhethweni: ukwenza ubulili kunokuba / emva kokuxabana nokuthi umlingani wabo uxolise, wabanika futhi bachitha isikhathi nabo, abesifazane abaxoxwa nabo babethanda ukhetho lwesibili.

Iqiniso elithakazelisayo! Abamele bobulili bobabili bathi bangathanda izipho ngemuva kokuxabana, kodwa amadoda avame ukunikeza izipho njengendlela yokuxazulula izinkinga kunabesifazane.

Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ukuhlolwa kokuhlola kwakuncane, ngakho-ke imiphumela yalo kunzima ukukhiqiza futhi ithwale yonke imiphakathi.

Ucwaningo luya kanjani?

Abacwaningi bacela abantu abangu-74 ukuba bahlole izindlela zokuxazulula izingxabano ekusebenzeni kwabo, kanti nakuba amadoda abonisa ukukhetha okunamandla emisebenzini yezocansi, abesifazane nabo babengahambisani nalo mqondo. Babevele bathambekele ekuhloleni ukuxhumana ngenhla.

Izimbangela

Abacwaningi bakholelwa ukuthi umehluko uncike emisebenzini yobulili ebuhlotsheni kanye nezizathu zokuthi kungani abantu beqala.

Ucwaningo lwangaphambili lubonisa ukuthi amadoda angase ahlale nabalingani "abatholakalayo ngokobulili" (okusho ukuthi imibhangqwana ibe nezocansi ngokuvamile), ngakho-ke kunengqondo ukuthi bayakwazisa ubulili njengendlela yokuthuthukisa isimo.

Phakathi naleso sikhathi, abesifazane bathanda izibonakaliso zokuthinta ngokomzwelo, hhayi ngokobulili, ngakho-ke banamathuba amaningi okukhetha ukusebenza kule nkinga, hhayi nje ukulahla.

Futhi ingabe konke kuyinto engavamile kangaka?

Imiphumela ibonisa izinto kuphela abesilisa nabesifazane abazibhekayo eziwusizo uma kuziwa ezimpikiswaneni eziphikisanayo, hhayi ngalokho okusebenza ngempela kakhulu.

Mhlawumbe, nakuba abantu becabanga ukuthi bafuna ukuya ocansini noma bakhulume ukulungisa isimo, ukhetho oluhlukile lungasebenza kangcono ngokuqondene nobuhlobo babo. Akunjalo ngempela impendulo eyodwa kuphela.

Isiphetho esingayithola kulolu cwaningo akufanele 'siyeke ukuhlanganyela ocansini lokuxoxisana,' kodwa ukwamukela iphuzu lomlingani lapho sikhetha izindlela zokuxazulula ingxabano.

Vula evulekile ngezindlela eziningana, cela umuntu ohlangana naye, lokho acabanga ukuthi kuphumelela, futhi wenze nje okulungile kokubili.

Yiba nobulili, uma kusebenza kuwe, kodwa uxoxisane nesimo ngemuva kwesikhashana. Sebenzisa ubulili njengethuba lokunciphisa ukuhlukumezeka nokugcina imizwelo ngesikhathi yengxoxo elawulwayo.